Tuesday, December 2, 2008

'Gall'y What A Day


Oh Gallbladder we used to be so close. I admit I never really knew you all that well at first, but this last little while we’ve spent some quality time together. I know you must have been one of my favorite organs to hang out with. Your function of storing all my lovely Bile was much appreciated. I admit I really resented it when you brought your friend ‘Stone’ into the picture. Did you really have to introduce him to me on Thanksgiving and did it have to be in the ER? It wasn’t that I was jealous, but things started feeling a little crowded between us. At 1.6 centimeters he really threw his weight around. I wish he could have left us, but you made your choice and now I’m going to have to ask both of you to leave. I wish you could just go quietly and that there need not have been a third party involved, but I’m going to need some help when you move out. I’m actually going to need to throw some money at you (money that was earmarked for Christmas I might add) to help with the final goodbyes. I want you to know that I will miss you and I wish you and Stone the best. Oh by the way, thank you for the five pounds you’ve helped me to lose. It’s funny how your last meal requests have been applesauce, PLAIN noodles and alfalfa sprouts. We have until Thursday, so think about what activities you’d like to do together until then…sleeping…not eating…not drinking…resting…lying around. Yes, yes, Stone can come too…but only until Thursday. I’m already talking to my new favorite organ Small Intestines about Bile and I think once I introduce them they will make a beautiful couple. Dang, I HOPE they get along well! I’m not nervous at all, no not ONE LITTLE BIT. (oooohhhhh)

20 comments:

Kristina P. said...

Oh my goodness! I've only had one surgery, which was my appendix, and I was 8. I'm glad you're OK!

Tink said...

Oh my! I'm sooo sorry you've been having gallbladder problems. Both my mom and sister have had theirs out! But you, to have the problems on Thanksgiving?! Yikes. So cute how you did this post! Very creative. Good luck, my dear. You are in my prayers.

Jillene said...

HOLY CRAP!! I am SO sorry!! I have to have surgery in January and I am NOT at all scared either!!

I am sorry that this happened on Thanksgiving!!

Moneypenny said...

I am sorry to hear about you dilemma. Tony told us on Saturday. Hope you get feeling better soon. We missed you. Pam missed all your lovely comments:) Good luck with the surgery!

mindij said...

That was the best 'gallbladder good-bye' I've ever read! Stone sounds like a total jerk! We should egg his house!!! The one cool thing that comes with having no gallbladder is anytime you have junk food-it goes right through you! Gross, I know but my sis-in-law doesn't have hers anymore and that's what she told me! Good luck on Thursday and enjoy those alfafa sprouts!

rubberbandgirl said...

Ok, since I've already given you my simpathy, I'm here to talk about your writing. Gally, you left me in stitches. I'm glad you'll be parting company sooner than later.

Alyson (New England Living) said...

Oh, how awful! And on Thanksgiving too. Good luck on recovery!

Mina said...

I am so sorry. I'll be thinking of you. (This month I need to start making arrangements for surgery this June. ) I hope it all goes smoothly and that you're back up and blogging again really soon! xo

PS--funny post!

Kimberly said...

I'm so sorry you had a crappy Thanksgiving too. Let me know how I can help.

(funny post - i wish i was that creative)

Kerri said...

I'm sorry to hear that! I expect that I'll be needing my gall bladder out in the future. All of my moms siblings have had to have theirs removed and my Mom just recently had hers out. I have a lot of the symptomes that they have had, but not too bad. So I just hop that when the time comes I will have insurance that will help with it. I should just start saving up now!

Robin said...

All kidding aside, how can I help?

scrapsidaisy said...

I knew something was going on with you and I should have called to get the real story. When Conner was over the other day he was telling Gabe all about it. I heard him say 'stone' and then he started telling Gabe all about the organ that squishes up all of the cheese that we eat. Did he mean the gall bladder?? It was pretty funny. So after you have your gall bladder out how will you eat cheese? What will you have left to squish all of the cheese?? Maybe your appendix can learn to squish the cheese. I don't think it is good for much else and it should start earning it's keep. Please let me know what I can do for you guys. Do you need dinner? Diet coke? Can I paint your toes? Christmas shopping? Anything....let me know.

clan of the cave hair said...

owie owie owie. This completely sucks. I hope it goes well for you.

Kellie said...

Oh are you serious!? Ouch. I am so sorry. I had one of those and I thought I was going to die. I had no idea what was going on at the time. I can't believe it happened on Thanksgiving and now you have to have it out :( So sad! Stupid Stone, forcing his way in. I hope your small intestines and bile become fast friends.

Donna said...

Rachel, this was such a cute way to write about something yucky and painful and scary. I can't believe it happened on Thanksgiving too! I think your surgery to have it removed was today. I'm thinking about you and I hope it all went well!

Christine said...

Wow - of all the "What we did on Thanksgiving" posts I've read this week, yours is definitely the most original. I hope everything went well today and that you're feeling better soon!

a Tonggu Momma said...

Oh, no! I'm so sorry to hear this. Especially on Thanksgiving. Two years ago, my husband spent most of Thanksgiving Day in the hospital... plus a few days leading up to the holiday. Hospital turkey just isn't that great - not that you could eat it anyway with your gall bladder.

Am I a terrible person, though, if I admit to laughing a bit at your quick-witted telling of the story?

Lara said...

We missed you at book club, but I heard you are recovering well. I hope you continue to heal smoothly.

Melissa said...

Hope you feel better soon. That was hilarious, by the way. It's nice to have a sense of humor at these times.

Gale said...

Hope you get feeling better very very soon!